watched Thirteen Conversations About One Thing on arts central the other day and i love it. plenty of anecdotes and little bits of philosophy here and there for viewers to pick and chew on. the whole show is not in chronological order so it requires abit of thinking after the show. i like.
ask yourself if you're happy.
i suppose i don't have much to gripe about my life right now. i mean, i've friends i know i can rely on; i've a mother whom i have this love-hate relationship with but most of the time i thank God for her; i've a complete family; i'm not filthy rich but i manage to live by just enough each day; i don't think i'm fugly; and i am as privileged as any other singaporean kid.
i don't really know what exactly i want out of life anyway. i know i'm a fcuking hedonist; i live for pleasure and to enjoy life. i'm really a slacker; work puts me off. i know if i just put in that extra effort and discipline really, i'll be able to get the results i want, because i'm not stupid. but my efforts are just always half-hearted. maybe because i'm wondering to myself whether a fcuking certificate is really worth that much slogging over. so what if i get Bs, or even As. and so what if i get into that University i so badly want to get in, and do the course i want to do.
ask yourself if you're happy; and you cease to be.
okay i really don't know why i'm blogging such pessimistic stuff here; i usually pride myself on being optimistic; i know the pessimism probably puts people off but, don't know lah. these thoughts just come especially when you're online late at night.
ok lalala. maybe i'm just feeling stoned today. whatever. night.
icy fingers playing piano on my skin - 2:24 PM
grace chen
14 october 86
ntu
communication studies
long bus-rides
thinking of the what-ifs
the occasional alcohol
music