thistle;

Saturday, January 29, 2005

okkayy like nxt time if i ever even have good intentions just ask me to shut up and forget it because it almost always backfire and then i'll be left feeling like some freakin' stupid asshole who's just being nosey and kpo and unappreciated.

dont know whats wrong with me laa like nowadays too caught up with the lives and the problems of others. like everything just keeps coming in and in and i'm just listening to everything and everybody and i dont why but i cannot just dont care. if you're my fren i'll do smthg to help even though i know i may just be a pain in the ass or smthg. like wth laa. dont know whats my problem, seriously.

i shld just concentrate wholly on my studies and shiit.

and then its like today i went temasek poly after school with pris to do my hwk but i ended up falling asleep in the school canteen cos i was too freakin' tired. didnt even do much hwk todayy laa, only abit of econs.

aiyya i tink i was just seriously being busybody. like wth, others can handle their own lives laa. they dont need your help or anything at all, reallyy because in the end its their choice; their problem and their life.

and you should really just handle your own life well, grace chen, because you're so lagging behind in tutorials and stuff and you behave like you have the whole time in your hands, going around mixing with people who can afford to have fun unlike you who are taking your freakin' A levels this year laa. like, hello? wakeup wakeup.

haiiya i'm just feeling freakin' pissed off at myself laa because i dont even know whats my freakin' problemm. i tink i care too much. is that wrong? yeaa it is wrong when no one appreciates it and it becomes a problem.

talked to mitchell todayy about the abovementioned and such. hes my shss junior and hes really fun to talk to. you know its seldom that you get people whom you can really chat with and just tell stuff to.

aiiyya but once again it brings me to my point which i have brought up a few entries ago about how i dont want to get too emotionally attached to the year ones. because, hello, they might not even be there a month laterr?

one of my serious flaws is that i get emotionally attached damn easily. and i freakin' hate that. i even get attached to part time jobs in which i only worked at for a few miserable days? and like, yes, i like making and keeping new friends but not at the expense of heartache a few months laterr. but its hardd to make new friends in year two when everybody's like more or less in their cliques and all, you know what i mean?

haiix whateverrr laa. ohh but i did make one new friend today who taught me how to play carom (is that how its spelt). hahaa.

haiiya then its like all the year ones have all these crushes here and there it seriously makes you tink abt such stuff too although you dont want to. i dont know whether i like this guyy laa. aiyya i dont know anything laa. but hes cute and hes funny and hes niice. aiiyya wth am i sayinng. its stupid to have crushes at the age of eighteen laa. like whateverr laa. i dont care if i nvr get married and remain a spinster for life livin with three cats. argh crapshit.

and i've math tuition tmr, and its for three freakiin' hours laa, from 1 pm to 4 pm. but yeaa laa for my own good. i want to improve my math grades. hahaa.

must be a nerd alrdyy laa. care abt all these trivial stuff for what. the only other priority right now is to get chinese new year clothes and gifts for my friends on vday and thats all. matters of the heart all this crapshit can just go awayy laa. hahaa. must studyyy.

icy fingers playing piano on my skin - 3:43 PM